Should have listened!

As those of you who follow my blog & tweets will know, I have a thing about my weight. Ever since I became a teenager, I have had that obsession with how much I weigh & it’s always ‘more than I should’! I spent my late teens / early twenties waiting for my puppy fat to ‘drop off’ like everyone told me it would!

For those of you who have really concentrated on my writing, you will also know that my DS is getting married in December. His fiancée is a very IT clever, whizzy girl who wants to put together a montage & I’ve been asked to provide some photos of said young man.

Well! I’ve had an amazing half hour with lots of ‘OMG!’ and ‘Good grief!’ and ‘That bloody handbag of Mothers!’ I’ve gone down a number of reminiscing paths that have taken me back years. Some of them are real history items with my grandparents as youngsters.

Whilst it has been interesting, nostalgic & has produced lots of ‘Ahs’, it has also been very sad. I’m sad not for the life that has now past, although I wish I had done more with those years. What has made me sad is how THIN I look in most of them! Why did I not believe people when they said I didn’t need to lose weight? Why didn’t I just get on with life rather than spending so much time ‘pulling my stomach in’ & hitting myself with that guilt stick every time I had ‘something naughty’!

The years have obviously past & my body is a reflection of my age to a certain extent. I must take this into account I suppose & learn from my photo search today that life is too short to worry about the odd pound or two. Good health & fitness are what is important. It is that which will make you shine rather than being a dress size (or two!) smaller.

For those bloggers ( Paula, Becky, Naomi) who recently braved the camera in swimsuits but worried about the wh ole thing, you looked absolutely wonderful – truth!

Have you been a victim to misguided perceptions? What are your regrets?

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  • This post is spot on and what I fear regretting. Is so difficult though to accept yourself with no ifs
    Great post

  • I’m only 33 but i can relate to this post. i think you feel it at every stage. “why didn’t i make the most of things then”. So the only repsonse you can have is to make the most of things now. In 10 years you’ll only look back and say “look how young/thin/happy i looked, i wish i’d known”.

  • You have a fabulous reason so don’t beat yourself up too much. Having photos taken with the girls will be an excellent motivator though!

  • I’m the opposite! The one who’s never had to worry about her weight…until now that is.
    Always been stick thin and able to eat like a horse but now my twin pregnancy a couple of years back has left me with a very saggy stomach and a stubborn midrif that wasn’t there before, consequently I hate any photos of me right now and am more behind the camera instead of in front.
    I know this needs to change and I hope I get more confident with my new self so I can be in photos with the girls as they grow.

  • Julia – diet buddies?
    Sorry – I’m really out of touch on the blogs at the moment 🙁 but now I know what you were on about on Twitter x My whole guest post on Friday is based around this and I wrote it yesterday…

  • It is so true how we look back at our earlier selves and wonder why we didn’t appreciate that person more (and how she looked). I do it all the time. I have struggled with my weight since reaching my 40s and it is a real pain. I think as you say it’s about being healthy and staying fit. Just wish our society wasn’t so body focussed. We are more than that!

  • So true and probably most women will recognise this from some part of their lives. Why is it so important to us? It is important to me, yet I do know that I would rather be the shape I am and have my children than be thin without my children. Still though, I am very self-conscious. Great post. Jen.

    • Thank you! I’ve no idea why we get so hung up about it! One day perhaps I’ll relax. That’s when my OH tells me my weight will fall off!

  • It would be great if we could see ourselves as others see us and could shake off the gremlin on our shoulder which only sees negative and/or imaginary stuff. I was thinking yesterday how I wish I had realised how fab my legs were when I was 25 and could strut about in teeny shorts (because I didn’t) and how reluctant I still am to expose my legs. So this morning I put on a short-ish skirt and I feel fine! great post and so true!

  • Paula

    Thanks Julia, you’re so right! Whenever I look back on old pics I have the same feeling. That said, I’m really tired of looking at myself and doing the mental calculations of how I ‘could’ look…. this is the year that I sort it or shut up! Ultimately it’s really not that important though is it? I’ve met you and you are every bit the beautiful woman that I knew you would be, because I’ve already met the ‘real you’.

    The outer casing is a very lovely bit of packaging, but not the main event. xx

  • Aw thanks Julia, that’s so nice. I know exactly what you mean. We beat ourselves up all the time, making ourselves miserable when we should be out there enjoying ourselves. I promise I’ll keep your words with me! xx

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